Yesterday was my 35th birthday, and I knew that it would likely be a hard day for me to “celebrate” without Chris, and with my big kids being at their Dad’s house this week. Birthday’s haven’t been something that I really celebrate since I was probably under the age of 16, but wow do I have some memories of birthday parties as a child. My mom, bless her, was a brave woman and allowed me to have a slumber party every year from probably age 5 through 16, AND she allowed me to have as many girls over as years old I was turning. My slumber parties were always one for the books. We had so much fun doing all the girl things and being wild and crazy. As I got older though, birthday’s just didn’t seem to have the same appeal.
After I turned 21 I remember saying for a few years that I was celebrating the “1st, 2nd, 3rd anniversary of my 21st birthday”. After I had kids though my celebrations all but stopped other than going out to eat with family. After my parents passed, my concept of birthdays and age in general shifted. My dad passed away when he was 51, and my mom when she was 55. They were both SO young, and it really shaped my concept of age. I can’t help but think when I have a birthday, that I’m well past my prime if I only live as long as they both did. Of course I try to take care of myself and be healthy, but you truly never know what God’s plans are. I decided some time ago that I just have to enjoy each day knowing it could be my last, including those birthdays.
Despite not being able to sleep last night, which has become a common occurance lately, yesterday truly was a wonderful day filled with love from so many people. My principal at work started the morning with Starbucks and Erin Condren (she knows the way to my planner obsessed heart), Tiff’s Treats and Kendra Scott earrings delivered to the school from my sister, and a marvelous Mexican supper with my Granny.The biggest blessing of the whole day though was from my sweet students. They successfully completed a surprise serenade in the hall complete with handmade letters to spell out “Happy Birthday” that had been signed with sweet notes from them. They filled my cup and soothed my soul more than they know with this sweet gesture and their kind words.
These were some of my favorite notes from their birthday surprise:
“Happy Birthday Ms. Hughes! I hope you have an amazing day. You are such a kind soul and have helped me grow so much! Thank you!”
“You are such a beautiful and strong lady. We love you!”
“I hope you know that we love you so much and all that you do to help our school and students! You have worked so hard at what you do!”
It never ceases to amaze me how God gives you exactly what you need, when you need it. I had been dreading yesterday because the thought of celebrating anything right now just seems unattainable. However, in the way He always does, God showed up in big ways to show me that I am loved, appreciated, and not alone. Hopefully 35 will treat me well, but I will continue to live each day to the fullest either way, because I know God’s plans are perfect, and fear is a liar.
Fear is a Liar 
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